Infinity Nights
by paris1601
Summary: Set at Infinity. Fai goes out at night. Kurogane waits. Warning: Contains sexual themes and spoilers on Fai's past. KuroFai
1. Sex and Alcohol

**_Warning: _**_Sexual content. Nothing too explicit, but definitely contains mature themes._

**Infinity Nights**

**1. Sex and Alcohol**

"Ooooooh... Faster, yes! You're so good!"

The feminine voice coming from underneath him was lost to Fai's ears. It was a shame considering the beauty of the black-haired busty girl who was moaning passionately in pleasure, whether genuinely or not. He barely felt the pain when long fingernails dug into the skin of his arms as yet another girl reached her climax by his hand, or rather, sex. Even as she reached her peak, he kept thrusting at his own pace, seeking only his own pleasure. The vampire mage merely gasped at his release.

"Thank you, Alcyone-san," Fai murmured as he peeled the used condom off of him, knotting the open end so its contents wouldn't spill. The whole thing, he tossed into the trash without ceremony. His seed was worth nothing. He should never have children, else they might end up as wretched as he was. He didn't think to clean himself up before he put his clothes on. He was far dirtier than this girl ever would be.

"I had fun, too," Alcyone replied a little more sincerely than she normally would. She dressed herself up in her complicated leather outfit with efficiency that came with years of doing so several times a night. For her, the blond beauty was just another client; even if, according to the other girls, he never paused to rest before leaving, much less fall asleep. She paused when she saw one blue eye watching her distantly. "I'm sorry, I thought we were done."

Fai dug into his pants pocket and pulled out more than enough to pay the prostitute with him. He handed her the money, not even bothering to count as he knew how much money he had and had already memorized the going rate of women in those parts. "Thank you," he murmured after paying and began to leave.

Alcyone nodded towards the black-clad man as he left her room. Even if she felt the hurt he radiated, she didn't try to stop him and she didn't try to comfort him any more than she already had. That wasn't part of her job. She thought about praying for his safety or for him to find solace in sleep, but she didn't believe in any god so there was no point in praying.

The mage walked back to their shared apartment. After the heat of sex, the night seemed so much colder to Fai. Yet, it was all he had to ward of the chill of this country, whose darkness was somehow reminiscent of the world he was born in. The cold air made Fai want; made Fai need warmth that Mokona could not provide. He was a man, after all. Sometimes, heat, to him, meant more than a cuddle.

-

"Where have you been?"

The ice-blue eye did not show any surprise when it clashed with the very alert and scrutinizing red stare coming from the angry ninja on the receiving room sofa. There was even some amount of triumph in that lonesome eye. "You know where I've been. You've done it before, Kurogane."

Kurogane frowned for several reasons. Fai smelled of perfume, the type that whores used. The ninja knew that the blond had been going out for that reason after every chess game, which meant that the blond picked-up hookers at least four times a week. That was one of the reasons that Kurogane was irked. More than the fact that the visits were actually occurring, the frequency of Fai's visits to brothels bothered the ninja. What was piquing Kurogane's mind was that Fai was absolving himself of this sin of trying to screw every other loose girl in town by pointing out that Kurogane himself had, on more than one occasion, gone to those pleasure houses himself. A third reason was the one the ninja chose to mention, because it was probably the only one the magician would listen to, "The girl was looking for you. She seemed upset that she couldn't find you."

At that, some of the ice around Fai's blue eye melted to soften his gaze, "I thought Sakura-chan was already asleep when I left."

"She woke up," Kurogane explained tersely as he upended the bottle of sake he had been nursing over his sake cup. The bottle was already empty, which wasn't strange considering that daylight was about to break and he had been drinking from that bottle all night. "And she'll only talk to you, so I don't know why she did," the ninja added the last sentence as an afterthought in place of the reprimand that had been formulating itself in his head. What the mage did in his own time was none of Kurogane's business, anyway.

Fai merely nodded in acknowledgment. His silence ended their conversation. When he made his way to the room that he shared with Kurogane, he didn't even glance back at his prey. As he stripped off his clothes to get ready for bed, he felt Kurogane enter the room. The ninja dropped heavily on his own bed without a word leaving Fai even more alone than before.

Neither could sleep away the scant remainder of that night. What they both desired kept them both awake.

There was a burning hunger in Fai. He hadn't fed in days and their chess battles and his nightly activities were taking at toll on him physically. He didn't want to, and yet he needed to, so he waited for the other to invite him. Even if he hated the invitation to drink and live, seeing it as unnecessary, he also treasured the sacrifice and longed for it. And that longing made him hate it even more.

Kurogane, on the other hand, was concerned with both the wizard's actions and the reason behind them. Not only for the consequences that the self-destructive nature of the vampire's behavior would bring about in their quest, but also because Fai was someone he cared about, there was a gnawing need in Kurogane to know what was going on.

The unnamable tension between the two of them was so thick that you could use every other cliché and more to describe it.

"You haven't drunk in days," Kurogane's voice rumbled into Fai's consciousness. There was a rustling of covers as the prey rose from his bed and reached for his sword as he always did during feeding.

Fai, for his part, didn't resist or say anything. He sat up on his bed, as well. As the ninja cut his left arm, the blond turned his head away. Those cuts must hurt, and yet Kurogane never seemed to flinch. Blood, in general, didn't make him squeamish, but Kurogane's blood did.

"There will be a game tomorrow, if you don't drink now, it will be dangerous for all of us."

With a justification for his feeding in place, Fai reluctantly rose from his seat and crossed the small distance between his bed and the ninja's. He knelt by the other man's feet; that was the only action that was done of his own accord. As the bleeding arm was presented to him, the intoxicating scent of blood overtook him and instinct possessed him. Fai's lips landed on the wound created for his survival and caressed it lovingly, almost reverently.

When Fai's eye changed, Kurogane knew that the slighter man was not in control anymore. He mused that the mage was like a kite, seemingly free, but was in fact only following the opposing forces of the wind and its string. In the short time that the ninja made up that analogy, Fai's self had recovered and the feeding was over. The wizard never took more than the bare minimum to live. Even as a human, he ate only enough to satisfy his stomach, slept only enough to ward off exhaustion, and drank only enough either to remember or to forget (Kurogane couldn't tell and Fai wouldn't tell). Needless to say, Fai drank excessively. And that was the realization that struck the dark-haired man, as Fai began to wrap up the already clotting wound 'so the kids don't have to see'. It had taken only one night for them to realize that the vampire could no longer drink alcohol. The taste was intolerable at the least.

Perhaps Fai replaced alcohol with sex.

As Fai rose from the floor to head back to his bed, Kurogane watched. He understood now, somewhat. But that didn't mean he liked it.


	2. Memories and Dreams

_I wanted to reply to the reviews privately, but they were submitted anonymously, so..._

_Dear angry KuroFai fans,_

_I would like to direct your attention to the KuroFai tag of the fic. This may not be the usual fluff, but have faith; they __will end up together in this fic. I just wanted to write a story that would remind everyone that Fai is, indeed, a man, even if he does belong with Kuro. Also, if you remember the mood of the Infinity arc, there was no way that Fai would just fall into Kuro's arms. But, these are my opinions._

_Still, thank you very much for your honest reviews. I just wish you'd used signed reviews so I could reply to you privately. That said, here's the rest of the fic._

_With much love,_

_paris_

_I wonder if they'll get to read this, cause judging by their reviews, I think they wanted the fic to drop off the face of the planet. Oh well, I tried..._

**Infinity Nights  
**

**2. Memories and Dreams**

Fai hadn't gone out because Sakura had asked him not to. Something was bothering her and she found herself awakening from nightmares quite frequently. That she couldn't find Fai the night before made her ask him not to go out that night.

That was why Fai stayed home. That was why Fai was lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. That was how Kurogane found him, anyway, when the ninja entered their shared room. The night was still young and each other's presence weighed heavily on them.

Kurogane and Fai had slept together, in the most literal sense, on more than one occasion during their journey. Infinity was just another world where they had to do just that.

At this point, they really should be more comfortable with each other, but they were even more unsettled than before. As he pulled off his shirt and dropped onto his bed, Kurogane thought back to the many times the two of them had shared a room.

There were those times when all of them were forced to stay in one room. It was always Kurogane near the window, Fai near the door with Mokona, and Syaoran beside the princess. There were also some nights when budget constraints left the three of them with two rooms with one bed each, wherein Syaoran, the one that was no longer with them, would immediately volunteer to sleep on the couch so that Sakura and Mokona could take one room and the adults could take the other. If the bed was large enough, they would sleep on opposite ends of it as if an invisible wall separated them. If the bed wasn't large enough for them to not touch while lying in it, Kurogane would stay on the floor. And then, there were those days in Yama. They had been given separate quarters at first, Fai being an archer and Kurogane being a swordsman. But the men of the army were skeptical of their loyalties and were particularly suspicious of the pale man who didn't speak. Fearing for Fai's safety, Kurogane insisted that the magician share his bed. He thought it'd be difficult convincing the Celesian to share the small futon without the aid of speech, but all he had to do was give Fai a meaningful look and the blond unresistingly followed him. So the leery stares—both lecherous and untrusting—the blond was attracting like a magnet transcended language barriers, after all. Those nights, they slept with Kurogane's arms wrapped around Fai's frame protectively. Fai was resigned, but his body remained taut and stiff the entire night, even as he fitfully slept.

And Kurogane reflected on these things as he stared at the ceiling that night. He found it ironic that in the amount of time that the two of them had spent together, he had shared innumerable beds with the man, but he could count the number of times he touched the man to feel him. Fai touched him constantly in the past, playful and insincere. The pokes and pats and even the hugs were all done without meaning and Kurogane understood that, but that did not mean he did not relish them. That was why he rarely ventured out to feel the mage, knowing that if the other man was only capable of empty contact; then perhaps the reality of what was held by a brush of Kurogane's hand could drive them apart.

The ninja, astute as he was, proved himself right in that world where they lost the kid and Fai's eye.

Now that the magician was losing his grip on himself, Kurogane wanted to grab hold of him so much more than ever before. Ever since that day in Tokyo—no, ever since they met, he had been chasing after a man who was determined to head towards his desired ending. He did not want to lose Fai any more than that fateful day in that wasted country. The ninja wasn't afraid to entertain these thoughts. Real men were not afraid of their feelings. As intimidating as the growing significance of Fai D. Fluorite to him was, he accepted it and even welcomed it. In fact, he could already go as far as saying that Fai was his most important person. Wasn't it obvious, after all, when he allowed himself to become E?

But, Fai was a different story from Kurogane. He ran from his memories. He ran from feelings he did not understand or did not like. He ran from anything that threatened to bring these things to light. So, he ran away from the things that had lately become so blatantly clear by focusing on the past, instead. Even if he was awake, Fai tried to dream. Inside his head, Fai was back in Outo Country serving a cake he had just finished dressing with the most decadent chocolate dressing to his small family. In the Cat's Eyes Café in Fai's dreams Sakura was serving the coffee to Syaoran-kun and "Syaoran"; Kurogane was sitting there complaining about the sweetness of everything; Mokona was teasing Kurogane; and Fai was cutting the cake and serving it to Ashura-Ou and...

_...Fai..._

Fai shuddered as he stared up at the ceiling of their room. He hadn't thought about the other Fai in a very long while. He hadn't realized that he had been so caught up in all the things that had been happening--losing Syaoran, almost losing Sakura, fighting in the chess tournaments, running away from Kurogane--that he had begun to lose sight of why he was doing everything he was doing, in the first place. The young other Fai in his mind looked up at him so that his face was reflected in the other's wide blue eyes. And suddenly, they were back in the tower, back in Valeria, back in that horrible moment when they watched his twin plunge to his death.

The mage gasped as he relived the sickening impact in his head.

A red eye was fast on the magician who slowly sat up, shaking the memories from his head. Kurogane did not ask, Fai would not tell. So, as Fai left the room, running from his memories; Kurogane watched and waited for the other to come back.

Kurogane and Fai had slept together, in the most literal sense, on more than one occasion during their journey and Infinity was just another world where they had to do just that. At this point, they really should be more comfortable with each other, but they were even more unsettled than before.

_**Author's Notes:**_

_Short and bittersweet, but I hope you guys enjoyed it.**  
**_


	3. Substitute

I joined two chapters together to form this one. I hope it's as seamless as I thought it would be. Hope you enjoy!

KuroFai fans are so going to flame me for this one. But still, thanks to those who encouraged me to continue with this.

edit: I didn't notice that uploading to ffnet messed up my formatting. Hope it wasn't too difficult to read. However, ffnet also keeps messing up the fonts, so sorry about that, too. - paris

Infinity Nights

3. Substitute

"Remember this," Kurogane said as he watched Fai and Sakura once again retreat to the princess' room, away from Syaoran and away from Kurogane. Syaoran glanced up at him, quiet and questioning. "The princess is strong. Precisely because she is strong, she is fragile. if someone doesn't show her that, she'll probably break... soon."

Syaoran's face immediately darkened. He wanted to be that person to give the princess support, but the princess only leaned on Fai. The unspoken protest was easily answered by the ninja.

"It is impossible for that magician, for those two are the same."

Yes, the princess and Fai were very similar. Kurogane had seen that when they mewled the night away as Big Kitty and Little Kitty back in that dream world where they met the kid's former teacher. But, beyond the brightness of their smiles and the kindness in their hearts, there was also something deeper that made them so alike. And precisely that something, that fragile strength, made their closeness and being closed off from the other members of their small traveling group destructive for both of them.

Kurogane would have lectured more had he been someone else and had they not all had a long day. Come tomorrow morning, the ninja was sure that Syaoran would take Mokona out to look for feathers, so he ended his speech with a rather imperative sounding, "Go to sleep, now."

But, Syaoran understood the kindness in the older man's heart and he appreciated it. "Ah..." he responded with a small smile reflecting all the pain, exhaustion, and determination that was being the replacement for the princess' Syaoran. He also understood how worn out Kurogane was from waiting and the ninja would most definitely insist on joining him and Sakura in searching for the feather. "You, too. Get some rest soon."

The short affirmative answer and terse smirk that Syaoran got from his clone's mentor told him that Kurogane would definitely not rest soon. But, he left the matter at that and retreated to his own room.

Shortly after Syaoran left, Fai emerged from Sakura's room with the somber expression he always wore in Kurogane's presence. He spoke, retelling the events as a routine, "Sakura-chan fell asleep, along with Mokona." Catching Kurogane sitting on the sofa, drinking from a cup, he commented coldly as he was wont to in those days. "Are you drinking something?"

"Sake," in a tone not uncharacteristic of the succinct ninja.

Fai chuckled shortly, pretending to try to lighten the mood. "You are a lost case, aren't you?" But, his voice bore a weariness and strain that betrayed how he was truly feeling, that hunger was consuming him none too slowly.

"You too, drink," the dark-haired man ordered, rising from his seat. He knew that the fairer man would not drink if he felt that he was being given a choice. As usual, Fai kept his gaze averted as Kurogane cut his arm open. "If you won't drink, then do what you want, but it will just keep flowing like this."

Once again, lying to himself and telling himself that he was being coerced, Fai chuckled sardonically, "You are a lost case, aren't you?" He knelt by the ninja's arm and drank what he needed. Then, he lingered. Something, which he only did when he felt that there was something that he and the ninja should talk about. "We're being watched. I wonder if they're our next opponents in chess or..."

"...the ones who have been watching us on this journey," Kurogane affirmed.

Seeing that the larger man was aware, Fai rose and pulled away. That was all that talk that was necessary, so he began to make his leave. As an afterthought, he said, "Whoever they are, I won't let them hurt us anymore..." It was a promise that the blond intended to keep and hoped that those who were watching would hear and heed. With that, Fai left their apartment and headed out into the night as had been his habit of late.

-

"Looking for a good time?"

The masculine voice startled Fai out of his musings as he examined the lot of women in Infinity's red light district. When he turned, he found a large tanned man. The man reminded him so much of Kurogane, even if his hair was the color of the sun and his eyes were definitely not the red eyes of a dragon. "I'm sorry, but I'm looking for someone."

"Of course you are. Why else would you be here?" the man said. Fai found himself flushing, indignantly, but kept held his tongue. Why did he come here on Alcyone's day off, anyway? "My name's Rafaga the Great cause I'm the greatest in prowess and size in this area," the man introduced himself as a salesman would introduce his product. He held out his hand, "Would you like me to help you find what you're looking for?"

"I don't see how that's your business," Fai responded coldly. "So if you're done speaking to me, I would like to be excused."

Rafaga blinked, wondering if the smaller man was serious. When he made his conclusion, he laughed. "Damn. You're almost as sullen as that guy Lantis."

"Leave me alone," Fai started to walk away, but Rafaga followed him, his big steps easily matching Fai's.

"Hey, hey," the burly blond spoke in an appeasing tone. "Sorry if I offended you. I coulda sworn you swung that way."

Fai's blue eye flashed and at that sight, the larger man backed off somewhat. "What do you want from me?"

The other man shrugged. "The same as everyone here. Money and a good time," he confessed. "But I guess I'm not your type."

At that, something in Fai snapped. He dug into his pockets and pulled out the money he had brought for the night. "Here," was all he said and Rafaga grinned and led him to a room.

-

As Fai dressed and got ready to leave, his companion for the night called out to him in a way that the girls never did. "Leaving already?"

"We're done, aren't we?" Fai asked as he tossed the used tube of latex and zipped up his pants. "I've already paid you and don't have any money left on me, if that's what you want."

Rafaga's eyebrow rose quizzically. "You're not ready to go," he said as he stood up in all his naked glory—a beautifully built as a bronzed god—and embraced Fai. The smaller man stiffened, but didn't struggle in his confusion. In that brief moment, they were more intimate than they had been the entire night. Even more intimate than when Fai was filling the larger man with his length and pumping in and out of him frenetically. The callboy let his customer go with a light kiss on the cheek. "There. No extra charge. I thought you needed that more than you needed the sex."

Fai didn't thank Rafaga the way he always did with Alcyone and the other women. What was given to him by the man, he did not ask for. At least, he did not ask out loud. Even if he was more grateful to Rafaga than to anyone else he had been with at that place.

-

The more Kurogane thought of it, the more it bothered him. Fai was once again in a brothel, was once again with a woman. To replace the buzz given by alcohol with the natural high of sex was a creative move on the magician's part. He didn't really see any reason to stop it. He didn't see any reason to stop thinking about it, either.

And the thought of Fai having sex was making his body tingle with a different kind of buzz.

Sex was one of those things that Kurogane knew made a person's true nature appear. To touch the untouchable, barely palpable true nature of Fai made him want to see the blond in the throes of passion. He felt the yearning to take the smaller man, by force if he had to, if only to strip him of that infernal mask. Suddenly, Kurogane found himself needing to go to a whorehouse, himself. But, there was no way he was leaving the kids alone in their small barely secure Infinity living space without a guardian. The few times the ninja had gone out at night, Fai had been home to take care of the children. Fai needed these nights more than he did. He was a ninja, anyway, he had full reign on his physical desires.

When Fai got back, he didn't ask questions. Kurogane just sat there, watching.

-

The strange thing about Fai's encounter with Rafaga was that even if he had some sort of release, his body ended up humming with some kind of dissatisfaction that he couldn't shake. It was his first time with a man, not that he had any women before Infinity. Even if he had done nothing differently, the rougher touches, the harder body, these things made Fai infinitely more aware of himself. All this with a man that reminded him of Kurogane. He certainly hoped the ninja was asleep when he got home.

Of course, no such luck because hitsuzen or whatever wanted to make Fai as miserable as possible.

The silence that met him was more unnerving than the usual interrogation he usually got from Kurogane. Fai could ignore the third degree or brush it off with a short pointed remark, but the silence followed him everywhere. Even if he left the burning red gaze behind in the living area, he could still feel it on his back through the closed door. Those eyes did things to him that not even the most beautiful and experienced prostitute could. It stripped him naked of everything, even his mask. This flooded Fai with sensations that he didn't like entertaining, only because they were directed towards the ninja. It was a good thing that he didn't need to feed that night.

-

_A shower?_ Kurogane mused as he shook the sake bottle in his hand, checking for how much it still held. After briefly going into their room, Fai resolutely made his way to the bathroom with his usual soap, shampoo, and towel. Fai didn't take a bath to wash away his night's activities until right before the children woke up in the morning. Apparently, the blond seemed to find it necessary to wallow in the dirt of his sinful deeds. What was different this time? As the wizard walked past him, he smelled a scent that brought him back to the Nihon ninja training grounds and found himself frowning.

It wasn't the intoxicating scent of a woman, this time. It was the overpowering earthy smell of a man.

He considered asking about the change, but opted not to. He downed his remaining sake in one gulp and went to bed. He tried to dismiss the intriguing issue as he lay on top of the sheets he had not bothered to remove.

When Fai walked into the room, fresh, clean, and wrapped only in a towel, it took a good amount of willpower and ninja training not to get all over the magician's case. Fai, on his part, had his own questions to sort out in his head.

Once again, that night was sleepless for both of them.

-


	4. Bedtime Stories

**Infinity Nights**

**4. Bedtime Stories**

_He's a quiet one_, Freya mused as her brown eyes studied the dark-haired man on top of her. During their transaction, he was specific and succinct. He didn't even bother to give her his name, knowing that it was not important in the exchange. Even during the act of making love, he only made the proper sounds to release pressure and increase endurance. He was efficient with his movements, pleasuring both himself and her with no ceremony and least effort. His face appeared contorted in thought more than with exertion as he filled her and moved inside her body.

He fascinated her immensely and this fascination grew when he peaked and spoke unnecessarily, for the first time. "Mage!" he had cried out as he and Freya both found release.

Freya did not recognize the word and knew it couldn't have been from Piffle, else she would probably have come across it. She had, after all, a most diverse clientele because of the popularity of her innocent face and unusual blonde hair. She quickly assumed it was a name or an endearment of sorts. There was a twinge of jealousy at that thought, because she was one who yearned for someone, but knew she could not have him. Now, more importantly, if there was this "Mage", why was this man with her? Freya's inquisitive nature overran her envy and cynicism as she loved to hear about the loves and failed loves of others. She waited until they were both calm and their bodies had settled down before she let her curiosity take over.

"Who is 'Mage'?" Freya inquired in that childlike manner that made her questions impossible to keep unanswered. The dark haired man had been conscientious enough to hold her close after their activities, letting her revel in his warmth. When he said nothing, he pushed her small hands against his chest and stared deep into his red eyes. "You called out that name. Who is that person? Is that person your only one?"

First, there was a flash of anger at the intrusion, and Freya almost feared for herself. If she got this one angry, she knew she would be in danger. He seemed to be the type who would not think twice to kill her with quick precision. When he made no move to attack her, she relaxed a bit and settled back down on his chest. "If you have someone that special, why are you with me?"

"It's none of your business," the man answered tersely.

Freya pouted at the setback, but she knew quite well how to get her way. She feigned indignation as she said: "It _is_ my business if you insult me by saying her name while we're together. I am every man's fantasy and when we're together, you should only be thinking about me."

There was a thoughtful silence, and then. "Sorry," he apologized sincerely. "And 'Mage' is not his name."

"A man, then? Your special one is a man," Freya was a bit surprised, but did not think it too unusual. Some men just swung both ways. There were a lot of callboys--very popular ones at that--around Piffle, so why did this man choose her if he wanted to be with a man? Bought sex was about making, for a moment, fantasy a reality. And then, she remembered something that made her unique amongst the sex traders of Piffle. "He has golden hair like mine, doesn't he? You know, I bet I can guess who that person is with little trouble. Very few people in Piffle have hair like mine."

"You don't know him," the client responded shortly.

Freya nodded understandingly, "Because you're not from around here. I saw you win the dragonfly race today and I've never seen you before," she mused. "Men with your talent are easily noticed in Piffle." A devious gleam shone in wide brown eyes. "Come to think of it, that strange blond man who took second place isn't from around here, either, is he?" The man holding her stiffened making her giggle, "I hit a chord, didn't I?"

A grunt. "You talk too much for a harlot."

"I did," Freya concluded smugly. She then resumed her questioning, still curious, still mystified by the story of this stranger. "Since you're not from here, it doesn't hurt to talk to me. I'll never see you again, right? Things often get much clearer when you hear them said."

"I don't know that for sure," he murmured, closing his red eyes.

Freya was egged on by the slightly more welcoming response. She placed a hand on the smooth angled cheek. She idly noted that there didn't seem to be any signs of a beard or even a moustache. "He's beautiful, isn't he?" Her fingers lightly stroking his face made him open his eyes so that she was staring right down at those garnet orbs. He really did mesmerize her. "So, why aren't you with him right now?"

"Because he's untouchable."

He surprised her with his answer. With so few words that weighed so heavily, he expressed to her how much he valued that person. He showed her how much he was willing to give up for his special one. His words were vague, but there was nothing on his face that said he was trying to be coy or that he was deceiving her.

Also, she somehow understood him. The man that she called most important to her was someone she couldn't touch, as well. Their relationship was so precarious and delicate that the only way to preserve it was to give that person up. It was ripping her to pieces, but she did her best to live on for her twin sister, Elda.

They, she and this quiet red-eyed man, were the same in that sense and so she felt strong empathy for him. "Then, don't reach out too far. Don't touch what you're not allowed to touch," she advised. "Even the slightest touch can push him away."

And then, Freya bent down and kissed the man's forehead, gently, almost as how a mother would.

* * *

There was a strange finality to the click of Sakura's bedroom door. Everything had an air of anticipation of an abrupt conclusion when a tomorrow wasn't guaranteed. "Even though I might not have too much time left..."

Fai thought back to his own words. Chii had finally contacted him. He knew it would happen, but he wasn't expecting it to happen when their small family was barely hanging on by a thread. Perhaps it was Yuuko's hitsuzen, but Fai had viewed it a lot less romantically. It was the consequences of all his weaknesses, his lies, and his inherent bad luck that was consuming them; that was destroying them, just as it had destroyed his biological family.

"The princess is asleep?"

The blond glanced at the man sitting on the sofa, awake, with a cup of alcohol in his hand. "Yes. She's very tired." He began to turn around. He had planned on staying in tonight. There was no point in going out, anymore, now that Ashura-Ou was waking. The king would soon reach him, he would soon die. Somehow, that thought made Fai realize that, even if he forgot, reality did not change. What he forgets does not necessarily disappear.

Kurogane thought of questioning his fair-haired roommate as the man stood in front of their door, lost in his own world. He was at his seventh cup and there was still about eleven cups of sake left. If the night chose to wear on, he had the necessary alcohol.

"You really should stop drinking so much, Kurogane."

Fai started the conversation for them. It felt strange to Kurogane, almost nostalgic. "Excesses of any kind aren't good, mage," the ninja replied gruffly, not feeling it was necessary to point out what excesses he was talking about.

"A drunkard father and a whore mother, no wonder," Fai chuckled softly, probably not realizing that he had said the internal joke out loud. He really didn't need the other man scrutinizing him and making him feel even more vulnerable than before. Maybe he should go out, after all, even if there was no point.

Kurogane shot up to his feet. "Oi!" Now where did that come from? The magician's self-deprecating was reaching new heights. Perhaps it was time for someone to intervene. But, the slighter man dismissed him by reaching for the doorknob of the main door. "Oi, mage!" the ninja called out again as the door to their apartment closed behind the blond.

_Don't reach out too far. Don't touch what you aren't allowed to touch._He reminded himself of what pressing too much resulted to. He did not want to push Fai any farther away. _Let him do as he pleases. _Kurogane fell back down on the sofa. He glanced at the sleeping Syaoran beside him and the Mokona in the boy's arms. "Eight of one and half a dozen."

"Are you looking for Alcyone-san?"

His single blue eye rolled down to look at the owner of the young voice that had spoken to him. The blue-haired girl in front of him stared up at him expectantly, waiting for the regular customer to make his regular purchase. "What's the point?" he murmured.

The girl looked startled and confused. Then, in an act that was characteristic of her petulant nature, she burst out, "If you don't want what we have to offer, just come right out and say it!" she yelled angrily. "And if that's so, why did you come here, anyway?"

"Because he can't get enough of me," Rafaga's rich baritone filled Fai's ears. The man stepped forward from the crowd of hookers and pimps, holding his hand out. The smaller blond watched him vacantly with his one eye, but accepted the hand with no protest or word. "See? I'll be busy all night, Umi-chan. This one's feisty."

Umi, the blue-haired girl, looked concerned, but she retreated back to the line of men and women waiting for customers.

"Just so you know, I can't pay you," Fai informed his escort in a deadpan voice.

Rafaga shrugged, "I'll settle for whatever you've got." Fai kept his eyes fixed on the road and the bulkier man easily interpreted this. "You don't have anything, do you?" He scratched the back of his head, probably calculating what money he had, then he threw his hands up. "Screw it. Let's go, anyway. Tonight's my treat."

* * *

Rafaga shifted under the covers, turning to the slighter man in his arms. He found it a bit uncharacteristic that, this time, the man did not rush to push him away and leave. He wondered if it was because the smaller blond did not have money to pay for the evening that it was going by Rafaga's terms.

At the beginning of their tryst, the one-eyed blond seemed lost in thought and uninterested, but he did not resist Rafaga's advances. Not one to take people by force, Rafaga had gone slow, checking for signs of unwillingness; but as time went on, his companion's responses became more and more involved, his emotional baggage suddenly checked at the door of their cheap motel room.

The strange blond even allowed himself to be topped.

Now that they were done, now that their usual connection had been broken, Rafaga asked himself what to do. He was so used to having sex as a service that he had forgotten how to do it in the more meaningful sense. "But, somehow, we got things in reverse," Rafaga joked to himself out loud.

The blinded man said nothing, did nothing, and kept staring blankly at the space right above the bulkier man's shoulder.

"Can I ask you something?"

These words seemed to wake him up, but even so, all the pale man did was lean his head away from Rafaga's naked form so that his expression could not be seen. Despite that, he still replied "Yes", but not without much hesitation and not after a long span of tense silence.

The prostitute sighed and gently pushed the fairer man's face back towards him. "I'm a whore, I don't even know your name, because asking questions is bad for business."

The blue eye remained evasive.

"What I know about you is what I see and feel when we're together and that's how I usually prefer it. I don't like hearing about the families that I hurt or the relationships I corrupt," Rafaga continued, trying to fill the dead air. He pulled the other man into a tighter and more protective embrace, bringing the unresisting form's ear close to his lips. "But it's time you became honest with yourself, even for a moment," he whispered, as if telling a valuable secret. And maybe he was, because shortly after he spoke those words, the body pressed against him began to tremble with quiet sobs. He never got to ask his question, forgetting it as soon as the tears began to fall from that one stormy blue eye. But, Rafaga didn't mind. Those tears, he knew, said more than any words he could pull out from the man.

As he walked the man out the door of the motel room and silently bid him farewell, Rafaga knew that he would never see him again.

_**Author's Notes:**_

_I'm not sure if I ever mentioned it, but even if I write stories with sexual encounters, I've never written a full-blown lemon in my life. I don't think I ever will. This is just to inform those who are waiting for that. Sorry, it's just not something I am capable of doing. Also, I think it's against ffnet's rules, anyway._

_In any case, I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter. Reviews are welcome. Thank you to those who put this fic amongst their favorites. I don't mind flames from angry KuroFai fans, although I would prefer it if flamers kept their reviews signed, so I can address their concerns. I don't usually bite._

_That said. Thanks for reading._

_-paris_


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